365 days.

Dear Buff,

My heart feels heavy with the responsibility of this letter. I've been thinking a lot about the past 365 days because SO much has happened.

365 days ago, a dream three years in the making was handed to me and then taken away. 365 days ago I saw an 8th grader laying in a casket, just days after his 8th grade dance. Both events left my heart hurting, and yet the days that followed were filled with such peace. The 365 days since these two events have been not only the hardest, but also the most amazing. God has been so real this past year. It's all felt so much bigger than me and my small little world.

In the past 365 days...

Friends have had babies, lost babies, and gotten pregnant.

Friends have gotten married, divorced, and engaged.

I've made some incredible new friends.

I lost 20lbs. and then gained it all back. (Not proud of this one.)

People have moved away, people have come to visit.

Work....oh man work. The adult life struggle.

Friends have lost jobs, hated jobs, loved jobs.

In the past 365 days, I was given the job I swore I'd never do, and I've made it through. God gave me a village of the most incredible people (if you're reading this, then I probably mean you...) who've been behind me every step of the way. Every single person who supported me has been with me as we've...

...increased reading levels.

...learned to INDENT. Well, at least some of them have...

...survived the PSSAs.

...learned to work hard (we announced a pop quiz and not one student complained...).

...gone from dumping our desk to asking for help.

...dreamed big dreams and reached for goals.

...gone from screaming and throwing things and flipping chairs, to putting our head down to calm down for 5 minutes. (I'm really proud of this one.)

I've learned that these kids have unthinkable pain, yet hearts of gold. I've learned that patience and a quiet voice can go extremely far. I've learned it's really hard to share a classroom with another person, but I also most likely wouldn't have made it through without them. I've learned that paperwork could very well be the end of me. Every laugh, cry, rant and wtf moment has been a brick in my foundation.

Tears streamed down my face as I drove to work today, and the song Hills & Valleys came on the radio. "Father You give and take away, every joy and every pain. Through it all you will remain over it all."

The past 365 days have changed me forever. Some days I wasn't sure my heart would make it, but I'm proud to say I have. The best part? It's all been in Gods beautiful and perfect timing. Had things gone the way I'd pictured they'd go 365 days ago, I'm not sure where I'd be today. I can tell you with 100% certainty it wouldn't be on the path God had for me, because that's definitely where I am now. His hand was all over the past 365 days and for that I am forever grateful.

Thanks for being there for so many of 365 days over the years. Love you forever,

Lize